Clients who do well in counselling are not a rare breed. In fact, most people tend to thrive in therapy once they meet the counsellor they connect with. But over the years, enough clients have crossed my couch for me to see that those who get the most from it tend to share similar qualities or traits. Here’s what they have in common.
They have a good rapport with their counsellor
The one thing we know, above all else, is that clients who get good therapeutic outcomes have a good relationship with their counsellor. They are fond of their therapist, trust them and feel as though they want to confide in them. And the research bears this out
Because relationship is the number one predictor of success, then it is worth considering changing your counsellor if you’re not gelling. This short video may help you if you’re feeling anxious about having this conversation.
They let trusted family and friends know they’re in counselling
Clients who do well in counselling have put the groundwork in by confiding in their trusted friends and family. This serves two purposes. Firstly, it opens up the door to start having honest conversations about your emotional state with those closest to you. You’re essentially letting friends and family know you’re going through a hard time and might be reaching out to them for support. Secondly, it means they can assist in making sure you arrive on time and calm to your counselling appointment. So, let your partner do the school pick up. And if you trust your boss, then tell them too. That way they can ensure a pile of work isn’t popped on your desk at 5pm.
They’re prepared for therapy to get uncomfortable
Counselling can be really uncomfortable. In fact there is a well known phenomena called the therapy hangover. This is where post counselling session clients feel weepy, listless and even physically ill. Counselling is not easy, but it is worth it. And clients who do well in counselling know this. They prepare themselves for the pain and discomfort, trusting that everything will look and feel better when they come out of the other side.
If you’re experiencing discomfort in counselling, whether mild or severe, please do let your counsellor know. Because they can take the sessions at a slower pace or teach some useful relaxation exercises to be used at home. Either way, you don’t need to suffer alone and your therapist wants to know how you’re feeling.
If you want to share your thoughts on what helped you to get the best out of therapy then I’d love to hear them. Please comment below and I’ll get back to you.