My very first counselling placement was within bereavement. Where I listened as clients explored their grief. Often they spoke of shock, sometimes abandonment and occasionally a sense of overwhelm. Reflecting on this work, I’m struck by how inept words are to express the raw, desperate, profound feelings that death can deliver to those left behind. … Read more
From the moment I started earning money, I have been desperate to spend it. I hear the siren call of the shops, wherever I am. For me a day without an Amazon package is dull and grey. But when I know my doorbell will be ringing with deliveries, there’s fission and purpose in the air. … Read more
I’m so used to studying heavy going mental health books that reading entrepreneur Anya Hindmarch’s, If in Doubt Wash Your Hair, was like a mini break for the mind. There’s no trauma, grief or suicide here, just Anya’s common sense advice on how to live a more fulfilling life. From the chic front cover (sunny … Read more
We’re now half way through the year, which is the perfect point to reflect on how you feel. And, if you’re among the majority of people who made glittering new year’s resolutions back in January, only to find they’ve fallen by the wayside, then don’t worry. There is still plenty of time to get galvanised … Read more
If I were to say women weightlifters, what would your first reaction be? Because, if like many people, you instantly think ‘unattractive and unfeminine’ then you may want to take a look at Stronger by Poorna Bell. Within the 300 pages of Stronger, Poorna makes more salient, incisive points around female fitness than I’ve found … Read more
You’re a good person, right? I bet you’re mostly kind to others, hold doors open for strangers and help your friends when they’re having a tough time. But have you ever done something so against your moral values that you struggled to forgive yourself? If so, you may have experienced moral injury. And even though … Read more
First, the background What is a life shock? It’s the, “Unexpected moments that accompany the onset of illness, divorce, redundancy, bereavement or any major challenge.” writes Sophie Sabbage, Lifeshocks author. Sabbage is an advocate of the ‘everything happens for a reason’ school of thought. She believes life shocks are really just encouraging us to reveal … Read more
This Sunday in the UK it’s Father’s Day. A time where we reflect on everything our dads have done for us. But what happens if your father wasn’t so fantastic? And how hard is it to overcome the impact of his less than perfect parenting on your love life? It was Freud who first suggested … Read more
The first thing that strikes me about Roxane Gay’s memoir, Hunger, is how real and raw it is. There is no dressing up the truth . Gay is morbidly obese. And she was also gang raped at 12 years old. There is a link between those two things. And as an adult she can trace … Read more
Forgiveness, we’re told, is a wonderful thing. It sets us free and supports good health. All spiritual texts agree, forgiveness is the way forward. Yet quite frankly, forgiveness can sometimes feel impossible. And the effort expended in attempting to forgive can be mentally exhausting. And often futile. So, what to do when you can’t forgive? … Read more
Hollywood star, Sharon Stone, writes a good biography. Which shouldn’t come as a surprise to me, as I once read that she has an IQ of 150. And yet it does. Within Sharon Stone’s autobiography The Beauty of Living Twice, she writes conversationally, authentically and with surprising sensitivity about sexual abuse, a brutal childhood and … Read more
Yesterday, while browsing Facebook I came across this post. And it’s a perfect illustration of toxic spiritual psychology. On the surface, this post seems fine. It offers a comforting, reassuring, and seemingly practical way to feel better. After all, what’s easier than thinking thoughts of joy and believing the universe will send yet more good … Read more