Last week I received an email from a woman asking whether I believed counselling can work for everyone. She wrote that she’d tried therapy, a few times, and found it ineffective in helping her unpick her own feelings. Throughout her email I picked up on a tone of sadness and frustration. The type we’re all … Read more
Here’s a secret that every counsellor wants you to know. The best time to seek counselling is: Now. As soon as you possibly can. And especially before things get really bad. So, from the very first moment you have a feeling, or a half-formed fleeting thought that something’s not right, don’t delay. Find a counsellor. … Read more
Before you settle down on the counselling couch, there are often multiple obstacles to overcome. There’s arranging time off work, sorting childcare and, during a cost of living crisis, finding the funds for your counselling. But I think the biggest barrier of all, is managing the overwhelm you feel as you try to understand the … Read more
You thought so carefully about what you wanted in a therapist. Spent days scrolling through counselling directories, picked the professional you imagined you’d work best with, and then began to slowly reveal your innermost thoughts to them. But despite your best efforts, you’ve realised your therapist is ineffective, a bit irritating or just doesn’t get … Read more
Is becoming a counsellor something you’ve been considering? I know, for me, it swam in the back of my mind for years, before I eventually took the plunge and began training in 2015. And Interestingly, it will occasionally cross the mind of my clients too, as they come towards the completion of their time in … Read more
On a long flight last week, I listened to a great podcast by the therapist, Marisa Peer. She spoke about the stories we tell ourselves. Exploring where we first picked these stories up from, who told them to us and, most importantly, are they even true? As a counsellor it’s my privilege to listen to … Read more
I’m unabashedly biased about this -there is nothing quite like counselling. It turned my life around, making me less brittle and more able to tolerate difficult emotions without exploding. And now, as a counsellor myself, I see and hear of similar benefits experienced by my clients all the time. But sometimes, actually getting to counselling … Read more
Choosing a counsellor, can be an overwhelming experience. There are so many therapists out there, that it can feel impossible to pick the right one. Googling can be hit and miss, and counselling directories can send you into an eternal scroll. To help make the process a little easier, I’ve created this vlog on choosing … Read more
When I reflect on my first experience of counselling, it really was a case of gathering up all my courage and hoping for the best. I took a leap of faith and, luckily for me, it turned out beautifully. In fact it’s one of the best things I’ve ever done for my mental health. So, … Read more
A friend of mine recently attended her first counselling session, and then returned dismayed, disappointed and down-heartened because her counsellor didn’t give her any advice. She complained, loud and long, that she’d paid upwards of £50 a session, and come away with nothing. Not even a crumpled leaflet. Far from empathising with her plight, I … Read more
Every Tuesday evening I go and see my counsellor. He is a skillful, compassionate and generally excellent therapist. At the end of our sessions together, I feel better. Better for having spoken about my feelings, faced my fears and explored my emotions. But the next day… The next day is often awful. I am weepy, … Read more
It may be good to talk, but for some people it can feel really bad. It doesn’t matter whether you’ve experienced trauma, take a while to trust or just come from a family that don’t ‘do’ feelings. Speaking out loud about your inner world can be frightening. I have to admit that when I first … Read more